Got Question.Com What Does It Mean To Do No Harm How to Convince Your Husband Not to Divorce You

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How to Convince Your Husband Not to Divorce You

I often write about preventing divorce and saving marriages. Usually, I chat with girls, (but sometimes I get approached by guys.) One of the most common questions I get is “How can I convince my husband not to go through with a divorce?,” or “How can I change -or myself. husband’s thoughts about leaving?” I find that many times, women who ask this question always want to know more things. They want to know if they can make real changes on their own if their husband is unresponsive or has one foot out the door.

They also want to know how to bring the spark back into their marriage and they want to stop feeling out of control and at the mercy of their husband’s thoughts and wants without any real input. They are tired of saying and saying the same things with the same results. They wish they could find the magic words or write the magic letter that would stop all talk of divorce.

Here is the truth. You can never “make” or “convince” someone not to get a divorce. Sure, some might be able to force a person to change his mind, but it will eventually backfire. There is a better way.

Because, if his heart is not true, the issue will repeat itself and your husband will not allow to be easily convinced next time. The best way to “encourage” your husband to change his mind about a divorce, is not to convince him or manipulate him, but to make him want to stick to your changed actions.

The Wrong Way To Convince Your Husband Not To Divorce You: Here’s what most women do and here’s where they go wrong. Many women feel that their husbands have pulled out all the stops. Nothing is off limits. They go into overdrive and go crazy instead of calm and panic instead of patient. They follow their husbands around trying to engage and get any reaction they can (even if it’s negative.) This only makes the situation worse.

Or, they may try to argue and debate with their husbands or “prove” to him why he is wrong. Or they try to convince him that if only he understood the real situation. he will realize that he is wrong.

Some wives try to be overly accommodating, telling their husbands that they will “do anything” to save the marriage and trying to “show” or “prove” to their husbands how much they truly love. them.

All of these strategies can backfire because they all use manipulation and worse, they all insinuate that your husband is WRONG and can’t make a good decision.

In essence, by trying to convince him that he is wrong about a divorce, what you are really telling him is that he cannot evaluate his own feelings, he does not deserve to be truly happy, and the his spouse prefers. strong arm him to get his own way rather than really thinking about his happiness.

I am not writing this to disappoint you. I just want you to see it from your husband’s point of view. The problem here is that your husband does not feel validated, and until he does, he will block you and it is important to focus on what you say.

The Right Way To Make Your Husband Want To Stay In The Marriage On His Own (No Convincing Involved): Hopefully, I have shown you that trying to change your husband’s mind or convince him that he is wrong by not listening to him will not work in the long run.

So, what is the best way to keep your husband in the marriage? In fact, he should keep to himself. You need his heart (and his commitment) to be completely there. So, you approach him from a place of validation. You tell him that you listen carefully to what he has to say, that you want to understand how you can help, and that you value the closeness that you shared before (and will not do anything to compromise it) with some changes to make things better. good for you both.

You look him in the eye and tell him that his happiness and the happiness of your family is extremely important to you. Tell him that you want him to know that you are available if he wants to talk or share with you what makes him feel better. Tell him that you only want to be around him positively from now on. He may resist at first, but he will remember this conversation later.

Then, you have to do it well. Because honestly, at first he doesn’t believe you. If he is seriously considering divorce, chances are you both made promises you didn’t keep. Maybe he was told things would change when they never did. So, now, you have to SHOW him (with your actions, not your words) that this is no longer the case.

Returning the Spark Can Make a Divorce Less Likely: I want you to take a moment and say something about how you treat your husband when you are dating. You probably take his word for it, put his happiness at the top of your list of priorities, and pour a lot of time into the relationship. This probably resulted in his feeling on top of the world. And, he probably thinks you can do no wrong.

However, it is lost somewhere. It happens to all of us. We all have responsibilities and priorities that get in the way. However, you must show your husband these two people again. You always ask yourself if the person you are showing your husband is the one he loves. (Often we lose ourselves and replace him with a hurried, distant, empty version of the other.)

But, if you get back the woman your husband loves, (in a genuine rather than manipulative way), he will do everything to convince with his actions rather than his words (as he did in the beginning).

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