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The Biggest Mistake That Singles Make When Speed Dating, and How to Avoid It
The biggest mistake singles often make at a speed dating event is forgetting to have fun. People tend to get stressed out by the fast pace and become too serious about the whole thing, which can be a huge turn off.
Try your best to relax and remember that you are there first and foremost to have fun. It’s by relaxing and having fun that the real you shines and allows you to make the best impression.
You’ll naturally be a little nervous at first, but once things get going you’ll be so busy meeting new people and having fun that you won’t have time to think about it!
Things you can do ahead of time to prepare
The best way to overcome your fear is to know what to expect. Read an article or two about what it’s all about, talk to friends who have done it before. Know the types of questions that are asked and prepare some answers for them in advance. There’s no reason you have to be spontaneous at one of these events. Find out what questions people usually ask and prepare an answer to each common question. Then practice your answers a bit!
Find out what each question is trying to ask
Give an example from your life for each one, such as how you reacted when you broke up with your last partner. Or how you resolved an argument with a friend or loved one. Most, if not all questions are aimed at finding out one important aspect about your personality. For example, if you can handle anger without getting angry, or if you can deal with an emotional situation without breaking down, etc… Find out what the underlying behavior is that each question is asking about and get ready to offer the goods!
Stress reduction 101
Use other methods to reduce stress first such as listening to relaxing music or meditation. You don’t have to be a teacher to meditate! Just sit quietly for a few minutes beforehand and take a deep breath or two. Breathe out slowly. Try to clear your mind of all thoughts and worries. I know this is hard to do, but see if you can do it in just a minute or two. Naturally you will be less stressed afterwards.
Things NOT to do!
Do not take sedatives. or drinking too much beforehand, as you are guaranteed to make a bad first impression on everyone there. Have a drink if you want, but no more than that! While the event is going on, you can get another one.
Drink water or tea instead of alcoholic beverages. Remember that you only have about 90 minutes to meet 10-15 people so you won’t spend too much time drinking. If you go to the bar after every 6 minute date, then you have plenty of time to drink at the bar afterwards.
Sleep well. If you go out on the town the night before and stay the night, you won’t be at your best. As the name implies, speed dating is a fast-paced event. You need to have all your wits about you to make a good impression.
Dress for success
Be clean and have a good appearance. People naturally look more successful and impressive when they dress well. That doesn’t mean you have to wear an evening gown or a three-piece suit! Dress semi-formal or business casual, that way you don’t go out underdressed or overdressed for the occasion.
Bring a (trusted) friend with you
This is a good way to reduce the pressure, because you have a built-in security blanket. However, friendship can be quite tense and competitive with romantic issues. The best way to avoid this is to bring a friend of the opposite sex. Someone you like but are not romantically involved with.
Try to be yourself, and act like you normally do. Don’t put on an act to try to impress people; It is likely that this will not be true. And even if you fool someone, how long will it take them to realize that the person they met at the speed dating event is not really you, but someone else?
First and foremost, Have Fun!
Speed dating is a fast and fun way to meet a lot of people in a short amount of time. It allows you to get out of your own social network and make some new friends, acquaintances, and possibly your next romantic interest. When you go to your first speed dating event, make it your main goal to have fun and meet lots of new people. That way no matter what happens, your night will be a success!
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